i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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