Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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