Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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