You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
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