its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
