she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
