Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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