in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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