What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I have tasted many bathrooms
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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