i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
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