Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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