we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize