imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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