Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
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