Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
