But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
