i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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