not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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