I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We are two peas in an std pod
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
