oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
