Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize