we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
