Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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