well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
