There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
