the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
