I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
