shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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