How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
