The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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