One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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