like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
