i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
