Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
try to milk me bitch
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