So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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