It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
