Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
