addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
