Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
