i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
