Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
