i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
do nipples grow back?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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