Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
