what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
