To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
