I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
