CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
