are you still at the devil's house?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
