I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
