would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
