Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
